A documentary ‘Stopping Male Suicide’ is currently online

BBC2 Horizon documentary ‘Stopping Male Suicide’ informatively investigates the issues without dwelling on labelling people or traumatic stories. Available on iPlayer until 21st September 2018.

The subject of suicide has become deeply important to us at many levels, but we’ve found hardly anything by way of TV programmes or films that say much that is useful on the subject.  Finally, a BBC2 Horizon documentary has just been televised that informatively investigates the issues without dwelling on labelling people or traumatic stories.  It’s a worthwhile and educative watch ending in pointers to progressive ways forward.  ‘Stopping Male Suicide’ can be watched online now:

stopping male suicide - watch on iplayer
Stopping Male Suicide – watch online now

Direct Link:

We’ve added this to Naseeb’s memorial blog as an exception because it’s better than most and reflects some of the issues we have been exploring since Naseeb passed away.  We hope to be able to share what we have been working on in the near future.  We encourage everyone to share this accessible film.

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Mirrors, Memories, Light

A second anniversary, trying to distil some thoughts and feelings, a father’s reflections in poetic prose.

I wrote this a few days ago over the late May bank holiday, the second anniversary of Naseeb’s passing, and wanted to share it with anyone who remembers Naseeb.   I know quite a few friends are wondering how I am and I never manage to put it into words properly or sometimes don’t say much at all, but I guess this gives an idea though its written at the toughest time of the year for both us parents.  Its kind of written in a poetic prose-monologue style, not on purpose it’s just how it came out and then tidied up to be shared.

– – – – –

Mirrors, Memories, Light

We’re having a beer at a busy square in a bohemian locality of Barcelona.  This evening a crowd of young people gather together, chatting, chilling, a few playing instruments.  You’re imbued with the energetic and creative vibe of the place and feel you’d love to come here maybe to stay one day.

We’re canoeing around a small lake at Gwalia farm near Machynlleth in Wales.  You’re 10 years old with a face full of radiant vigour.  Later you fall into the water and drench, big hassle when we’re away camping.  Hey ho, since when was a drenching allowed to get in the way?  Next day with that mischievous smile you’re raring to go again.

Two years have passed,
you’re still not here.
My phone is always switched on
awaiting your call, though
I know it will never come.
But what if it did?

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Poem for Naseeb read by Erin and Billie

This poem was read out by Billie and Erin when the tree was planted in memory of Naseeb at Longford Park last year.  It’s taken a while for this to be posted, thanks to Meghann for getting the words to us.  It’s nice to have it now as a revisit to that day a year ago.

The Poem:

We thought of you with love today,
But that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday
And days before that, too.
We think of you in silence.
We often speak your name.
Now all we have is memories
And your picture in a frame.
Your memory is our keepsake
With which we’ll never part.
The sky has you in its keeping
We have you in our heart.

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Your birthday will never pass uncelebrated

We wanted  to share this beautiful Facebook post from Naseeb’s friend Meghann Forrest which was created on his birthday this year.  The drawings and poetry are full of warmth and sensitivity, delicately photographed with the daffodils.  Here it is:

Your smile is one to always remember,
Your laughter will always be infectious,
Your kindness always overwhelming,
Your spirit will always be unparalleled.

You will be in our thoughts forever,
Your birthday will never pass uncelebrated,
Your heart will be carried in our hearts,
Your memory will never be forgotten.

Happy Birthday Chew x

Here is also a message that Meghann sent us on Naseeb’s first birthday after he died:

Hi Balwant and Kooj,

I hope you are well. I just wanted to let you know that yesterday me, Sarah and Dom bought some daffodils and walked up to the viewpoint in Brandon Hill Park. We left the flowers on a bench overlooking Bristol, to wish Chewie a happy birthday. I felt it would be a good place to celebrate his birthday due to his love of nature. I’m sure he would have visited this park during his time in Bristol. My thoughts were with you both all day.

I also just wanted to say thank you for the way you raised Chewie, he was always so kind, respectful and had the most beautiful heart; he really was a credit to you. He will always be in our thoughts, and in our hearts. I look forward to seeing you both again at Easter when we plant a tree for Chewie, and I look forward to having a place to go and remember all of the amazing memories I have of him.

Sending you both lots of love, Meghann

Thanks Meghann, and to all our friends for their reflections and support in the different times and ways they give them.  x

Tree Planting in Memory of Naseeb + gallery

Finally we’ve managed to put together the tree planting photos with Naseeb’s poem, an afternoon of words, music, food, friends and memories.

On 13th April 2017 a bunch of us (Naseeb’s friends and family) got together in Longford Park, Stretford, Manchester to plant a tree in his memory.  A previous blog post has details of the spot its in and about the tree which is a Prunus cerasifera Nigra, Purple Leaved Cherry Plum tree, and about why we chose that tree.

The weather was kind and we were in tender but good spirits.  Iona sang a beautiful version of a song by Laura Marling, Kooj sang a heartfelt version of Autumn Leaves (even though it was spring), Erin and a friend did a reading of their own writing for Naseeb.  Finally Balwant read out a poem that Naseeb had written when he was 10 years old (see below), and then we had food, drink and chatted.

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Naseeb, art and uprisings (with Femi)

A bold composition with strong lines and muted colours in keeping with the look of street and activist printing but with a modern contemporary twist. Yep, that really was him wearing the army gear. Naseeb, art and uprisings…

The Arab Uprisings caught the world’s attention in a very big way around early 2011 with incredible images of ordinary people standing up to and battling their governments. These images struck a chord with Naseeb, who also saw the links between them and other actions like the Occupy Movement. He admired those young people taking to the streets against corrupt authorities despite putting their own lives at risk.

That same year, Naseeb decided on this subject matter for his GCSE art project while at Manchester Grammar School. He roped in his friend Femi Nylander to pose together in similar action scenarios, and had themselves photographed by the art teacher. He split these photographs into cut out sections that could be reassembled. From these he created a set of tricky and labour intensive lino cuts which he then printed and reassembled into a final image, in combination with some digital printing.

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Poem to Naseeb from his father

With the end of May approaching, Naseeb’s father collected his feelings and thoughts then put them down as this poem to Naseeb.

I just wrote this poem to Naseeb, my son, on the first anniversary of his passing (27th May).  The circus of thoughts and feelings that have been swamping me crossed over with a photograph which I still had on my mobile phone.  The photo was of Naseeb at the airport in Rome at the end of a lovely holiday we had there in April 2015.  I’d hardly looked at it since then but it now somehow called out to me.

Here’s the poem.

Naseeb at Rome Airport, 29th April 2015: a poem to Naseeb
Naseeb at Rome Airport, 29th April 2015

Love is always breathing

There you were.
Defiant. Independent.
The airport queues in Rome
seemed endless
We all stood waiting
to inch forward a little,
but not you.
You sat down on the floor
Calmly pulled out a novel
and began to read.

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Longford Park Tree Memorial for Naseeb

On Thurs 13th April 2017, at 12:00 noon, we’ll be planting a tree in Longford Park in memory of Naseeb, all welcome.

Planting a tree in memory of Naseeb was an idea that some of Naseeb’s friends wanted to do a while back.  They got in touch and its taken some time to organise, but suddenly its now going to happen NEXT WEEK!  The planting will take place from 12:00 noon on Thursday 13th April through lunchtime.  The tree will be planted in Longford Park roughly in the centre of the gardens area of the park (next to the Japanese Gardens, number 17 in the map below) which is close to the Longford Park Stadium, Ryebank Road, Manchester M21 9TA.  Everyone who knew Naseeb is welcome to come along if they are free at that time, please pass the word on.

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Are the daffodils coming out?

The question of daffodils coming out was important for Naseeb very many years ago…

When Naseeb/’Chewie’ was young (as in ‘little’) people would ask him when his birthday was, he would reply “When the daffodils come out”. Ever since then we have had daffodils around on his birthday, which is coming up on 5th March. Not sure at all how we’ll feel on that day (bite nails…), but we got hold of some daffs and they are in a vase gradually opening up. If anybody else wants a moment to remember Naseeb you’ll have your own memories, but some of you might like to try a few daffs maybe… (…I know one or two are doing so). [originally posted on Facebook on 3rd March 2017 by Kooj, Naseeb’s dad]

[ps. image is daffodils photoshopped over Naseeb walking up the lengthy Spanish Steps in Rome 2015]

Onions, Chapattis, Chilli Peppers…

Memories come at oddly random times and so this is an oddly random post – about Onions, Chapattis, Chilli Peppers…


Chopping an onion the other day (ok ok, see the pic), it was one of those many times I remembered Naseeb. The way he hadn’t got used to it without his eyes smarting. He loved spicy food where chopped onions are essential so something he’d need to get used to sometime. Even with his eyes watering his face had that usual look of being as amused by it as he was irritated. He’d put on some music to keep the vibe going while we’d cook, all kinds of stuff though we did have a phase of both being into playing the Red Hot Chilli Peppers at one time – ok yeah very apt!

This post might feel slightly on the random side, though along with a pic of the onion here is also a pic of Naseeb around Xmas 2012 making some chapattis with his mum (I haven’t got one of him chopping an onion) to show he regularly did his bit in the kitchen. Naseeb is in my mind, sight, smell and sound all the time.


We’ve been a bit quiet leading up to Xmas and also afterwards which we struggled through. I wanted to post something since its been a couple of months since the last post, and good to have something a bit lighter? Plenty of news to come (and not more Onions, Chapattis, Chilli Peppers type stuff), including a date for the inquest and a tree to be planted for Naseeb in Longford Park. His birthday is also coming up – 5th March, which will be a hard but precious time for us. Thanks to so many people for the support. Kooj x (Naseeb’s dad)